Holi: A love/ Hate festival
Do you love Holi? Well I definitely do; but with T n Cs of course! I can't declare hands down that I can/want to play Holi anywhere! As much as I love it, I am sort of scared too. I can play only with my small bubble of known people, even that doesn't guarantee that I will leave the grounds with a smiling face. Having spent my early childhood in Mathura, the birthplace of Lord Krishna and hence the hub of Holi, I have heard of really scary things. The Holi of Barsana (Mathura district) is something that is on every adventure junkie's list but has eluded my checklist forever.
Holi is such an awaited fun festival. Although every year it gets me thinking about the same thing: is it a boon or bane? "Bura na Mano Holi Hai" is exploited in a very weird manner. Someone rubbing colours badly in the face (eventually getting into the eyes) : Bura na Mano Holi hai. Someone dashing into a neighbour's house early in the morning, ambushing with colours, eventually destroying the house, Bura na Mano Holi hai. Molesting someone in the name of Holi is so common amongst youngsters. This year, I particularly witnessed multiple incidents while on my regular walk in the park. I usually take a stroll in the green belt near my society, which is (not unexpectedly) a lover's paradise. To make things clear, I have never made out with my boyfriend in any park for that matter 😂😂😂 (maybe because my boyfriend married me too quickly?) but I can definitely relate with youngsters and their raging hormones, and the desire to whisper sweet nothings in a seemingly secluded place.
The way the boys were smearing colours on the girls' faces and necks (and upper part of chest) made me shudder with fear. On the contrary, those young females seemed to be enjoying. Maybe I overthink because I am too old. But the girl mom in me can't unsee this kind of behaviour. My daughters would be in such kind of environment after a few years and this would be the last thing that I would want for them.
Holi is often notorious for being an ocassion for eve teasing and for drunken driving and vandalism too. My husband gets a ton of fracture cases during festivals, and the highest number seems to be on Holi. It's a straight statistic.
My kids loveee Holi. It has become an annual ritual with their grandpa, going to buy the latest type of pichkari with colours and accessories of their choice. Of course they are in this tiny privileged bubble, where Holi means throwing colours at their society friends, while munching on piping pakodas, followed by a delicious comfort lunch with the community. Or attending our Holi parties thrown by the medical fraternity. Their bubble will soon burst, as soon as they leave their nests and realise that this festival of colours can turn really ugly.
What I absolutely adore about this festival is the exchange of gujiyas and colours and meeting old friends after a long time. However this spring celebration, which started with a noble intention has transformed into a commercial bonanza as well as a health hazard (both mental and physical).
I am a very optimistic person but a realist. So I am often brooding on these things. Hopefully, our kids (the privileged ones as well as the not so privileged ones) never have to see the ugly side of this festival. Let this remain their favourite celebration (as they say now) forever, without any TnCs. And even if something minor happens, let them have the courage to go past it because Bura na Mano, Holi hai!!
Do you love Holi? Or do you have any clauses attached?
20 comments
Such a relatable take on Holi! I love the festival for its colors, food, and bonding, but like you, I have my reservations too. The 'Bura na Mano Holi Hai' excuse has led to so much misbehavior, and that’s the part I dislike. Wish we could all just celebrate with joy and respect!
ReplyDeleteThe festival's vibrant colors and joyous atmosphere have always drawn me in, but the phrase "Bura na Mano Holi Hai" being misused to justify inappropriate behavior is something I've observed and felt uneasy about. Your experiences in Mathura, the heartland of Holi, highlight both the cultural richness and the potential for things to go awry. Witnessing young couples in parks during Holi, where boundaries can blur under the guise of celebration, is concerning, especially when thinking about the safety and comfort of future generations. The statistic you mentioned about increased fracture cases during Holi, as noted by your husband, sheds light on the darker side of the festivities. It's heartwarming to see your children enjoying Holi within a safe community bubble, indulging in traditions like buying new pichkaris and savoring pakodas. However, the commercialization and potential health hazards associated with the festival can't be ignored. I share your hope that future celebrations can retain their joyous essence without the attached conditions, ensuring that everyone can partake without reservations.
ReplyDeleteI love holi too. Only this year I was able to enjoyed it little bit with my twins. Memories only we can built and save forever. Love your post.
ReplyDeleteHoli is great if played in the right spirit. Mathura ki holi is something I would like to see but I feel claustrophobic in a crowd. I saw a few posts on twitter where men were manhandling girls in the name of Holi and touching them inappropriately. I do not think we should let that happen. I stay put in my house during Holi. I played only once with my family during covid time.
ReplyDeleteI think most of these Spring festivals Saraswati Pujo , Holi and Vday do have some mating concept at its core, I may be mistaken.That said, i do love all the things that you said, the banter , the fun , the funny faces, dancing , sharing food, coming together as a community etc but the dirty side of Holi is what makes me shudder too.Holi Milan done decently can bring colour to life.
ReplyDeleteHappy Holi! I haven't celebrated in ages but I do like the vibes. The touch part isn't welcome, but organic colours and gujiyas are always a must do. One should celebrate the colour in our lives and around us.
ReplyDeleteSuch lovely pictures!! Kids will enjoy holi. I guess its one such festival that kids would wait eagerly!
ReplyDeleteI agree with you on the advantages taken in the name of applying colours. However, with its ups and downs Holi is a remarkable festival of togetherness. The pictures are beautiful
ReplyDeleteI love how you captured the bittersweet essence of Holi—its vibrant joy and underlying anxieties. Your reflections are so relatable, especially as a parent. Beautifully honest and thought-provoking!
ReplyDeleteOh you've voiced my deepest fears about this festival, one that we didn't celebrate down south during my childhood days. But of course, now Holi is part and parcel of down south celebrations too. I personally avoid going out on Holi coz I don't like the "touching" part that you vividly describe. It is a cause for concern. Yet, the people participating in the fun are adults, I hope. Children should never be allowed to play Holi without adult supervision!
ReplyDeleteI completely resonate with your holi fears. I wish people played with some decency but they actually get an excuse in the name of festival. This is disheartening.
ReplyDeleteThe things which are passed under the title of "Bura na mano holi hai" are really not acceptable and have given the bad name to the festival these days. I just hope that people will start "bura mano" even if it's done on the day of Holi soon.
ReplyDeleteGirl, you bring out my mixed feeling for this festival so well. Its dual nature with the joy aspect and then the concerns around the way it is celebrated, I feel you totally. Your hope for a safer and more respectful celebration for future generations is a sentiment many can relate to. The personal anecdotes, especially regarding your observations in the park and concerns as a mother, are exactly why I have distanced myself from this festival, at least the loud and rowdy kind of celebrations.
ReplyDeleteI love how this post captures the mixed emotions surrounding Holi! It’s refreshing to read a balanced perspective, appreciating the festival's joy while acknowledging the challenges it brings. Very relatable!
ReplyDeleteI played Holi when in Lucknow. Not any more. Such a balanced view of a festival
ReplyDeleteHoli is often used as an excuse to ouch women inappropriately, hence I like to play holi with only trusted friends. over the years, holi has been a wonderful memorable festival. But yes, the challenges must be curbed, at least.
ReplyDeleteI love holi too - especially playing with water! But I hate using pakka colours or greasy stuff!
ReplyDeleteYou share my exact feelings! Though I haven’t played Holi much, hailing from the south of India, I don’t think I’m missing anything by not participating.
ReplyDeleteI love Holi and have enjoyed it a lot since childhood with a close knit group of friends and family. It had never been awkward for me, thankfully. That said, people use it as an excuse to eve-tease and simply behave like jerks. Definitely don't support that.
ReplyDeleteI totally agree with you. Holi is such a fun and colorful festival, but it’s uncomfortable when the phrase "Bura na Mano Holi Hai" is used to excuse bad behavior. Your experience in Mathura really shows both the beauty and the issues that can arise.
ReplyDelete- Anjali/Messymom